Change

I have never really been one to do well with change. I like routine. If I have made plans and for some reason those plans don't work out it may take hours for me to get past the change. I think that this comes in part from the deep sense of sentimentality (is that a word?) that I have. I want things to always be just as they have always been. If grandma had "that picture" on the wall in her bedroom and she gives me "that picture" then it goes without saying that it belongs in my bedroom. Ya know logical stuff like that.

What is worse than immediate change is the change that you sense in the future. As God begins to move and you know that He is preparing you for something but you don't yet know what that something is. That is where we have been living for the past year. Certain areas of our lives have become uncomfortable and we have had to look at them in a new way and begin to process that it may mean change is coming.

The other day I was particularly stuck fretting over one of those areas of change with an unknown end. We were driving to a friends house and the radio was on. I was in my own world and suddenly God just shook me back to reality with a song. All I could do was laugh.

The song was by Steve Green, it's called The Plan. Here is what it says:

I don't need to have the plan in hand
I don't need to have the end in sight
All I need to do is follow You
wherever you lead and do what You ask me to do

Trusting You Lord with all my heart
following You all my days
whether I can or can't understand
I'll acknowledge You in all my ways

Though I am pressed on every side I am not in despair
my faith in You will carry me through
though I may not see where You're leading me.

It was certainly a clear message about my impatience and frustration with the changes in my life. But as God usually does, He had more to say. On the way home from that same trip He gave me another song that has been carrying me this week, Jesus be the center.

Jesus be the center
Be my source be my light Jesus
Jesus be the center
Be my song Jesus

Be the fire in my heart
Be the wind in my sails
Be the reason that I live

Jesus Jesus
Jesus be my vision
Be my help
Be my guide Jesus

So now I am trying to take the focus off the change and the hardship it may bring and put the focus back where it belongs--on Jesus. And that truly is my prayer as we continue the journey through change-that it would all be about Jesus being at the center of my life, and the life of my family. There is no way that we can be harmed by the change if it is God directed and Father filtered.